How do I do this!

There are so many questions caregivers have. I had a million and probably still, a million more! Sadly, I found out very quickly that caregiving was a learned thing and you have to educate yourself, below are some steps that I took. 

Please know that I work for a law firm but I am NOT an Attorney, these are all things that I learned needed to be done. If it is Helpful, I am in Maryland. These things may vary from state to state.

About a year before this, my brother and I got Power of Attorney (POA). For us, it was fairly easy. My brother and I pretty much agree on everything, he pretty much allows me to just do what needs to be done. We have Dual POA. It is worded that if he is unavailable or unwilling to make these decisions, I automatically get the say. This works well for us but if there are a bunch of siblings, issues can certainly arise. Anyway…..There are different kinds to get. There is POA Financial and then POA Medical, then there is Advanced Directive (AD) and also Managed Care Agreements (MCA).

Here is what each one means....

POA-Financial: This will give the ability to take over all financial matters. You will be able to pay their bills with their money, from their bank account. You will be able to call debtors and discuss their financial affairs. You will also be able to do transactions at the bank, HOWEVER, I suggest you get your name on their bank account.

POA-Medical: This will allow you to discuss their health with doctors without them being present. You will be able to call their medical insurance, get medical records and anything relating to their health.

(These two POA’s are two different papers which any attorney can draw up. I cannot remember how much we paid but it was not a lot of money)

Advanced Directive: This is their medical wishes should they need to be kept alive artificially or DNR (Do Not Resuscitate). Feeding tube etc……A lot of hospitals have these papers, if your LO (Loved One) is in placement, the social worker usually has them.

Managed Car Agreement: Let me put it you straight up, Assisted Living places start at about 3k a month, that is on the low end and god knows what kind of care your LO would get for that. A managed care agreement allows you to be paid for your time and care of your LO. Remember that you will, most likely, need to claim taxes on these funds.

I am sure there is more but these are the important papers that I know of for now. If your loved one is moving in with you or you are their primary care taker, GET these done. You will need them. Even if they are of sound and mind, remind them of how important these are should something happen and you need to make decisions on their behalf.

People, I cannot stress that these papers vary from state to state, bank to bank and insurance to insurance. One company may require one thing while another something else. Always check with an Elder Law Attorney.

Meanwhile, Back at base, I came home today to finish the above but had to clean up poop splattered all down the side of the toilet with a pile on the floor! Seriously, when they say caretaking is not for the weak at heart, They were not kidding! So for the remainder of the day,, do I WHINE or do I WINE? lol

Stick around, I still have not gotten to the fun part!